In Which I start February with a loose map in mind

Good morning, dear friend! Happy February 1st, we have made it through the very chaotic and eventful month of January!! How nice is that? How are you, by the way? As for me, I am okay, it was a week of turbulence for me, as I started it without my meds, they ran out and it took me some days for my psychiatrist be able to give me the prescriptions. Just those few days without the medicine was enough to cause me immense instability, which is also one of the reasons I could not write on the blog, and I did try. I wanted to have a last week of January much more productive than it actually was, but anyway, it is what it is. 

The weather has been quite miserable, we are on the late height of Summer, wirh the temperature rising to 31 celsius in the afternoon, and staying as such for a while, and the more the sun shines, the hotter the atmosphere in my area gets, due to the asphalt. That said, not all is bad, because march and April, coming next, are months that in one hand have the hottest days of the year, but on the other, it is when the weather moves positively towards the rains of May and so on. It is not all lost, just having to endure some miserable times now, concerning the heat...

What are the plans for February? The classes are back, so I should study for them, that thankfully usually don't take much of my time. I pray I can draw, I would say three pieces before the end of the month, but I don't want to force it. Just when I think of unwarranted effort, my eyes become heavy and I shut down. Hard to overcome, when needed. When I feel I must overcome just to do a hobby, difficult becomes worthless, and I double shut down. But I would love to draw something, if also any idea comes to my end. I hope I can write, the usual standard is four posts per month, preferably more, but not always that is possible. I also would love to work on pieces I could be proud of, so there is that, as well. Not forcing it, as not to faint out of stress, but also, not discarding it. Thinking one extreme or the other causes me to, yes, shut down, panic. I want to finish the book I am reading, and start another one, both on audiobook and on the e-book format. 

More immediately, I would like to, if possible, attend a movie, that I am cautious but willing to see. It is the new one with the actor that I carefully grew agreeable with, Mr. Timothy Chalamet, or whatever his last name is. In fact, I was in background desire to see the movie he stars in, the movie Wonka, but so far the first few minutes of that one did not capture me, found the entry music to be sterile, and his voice to be over edited. Because I find hard to discuss some topics with friends, not because I don't know what to say, but because sometimes you desire answers that come reliably and fast. Most of my online friends, lovely as they are, are either absent or slow to answer. Hence, I asked three AI models for their takes on this project. So far, ChatGPT and the Google Gemini have understood my side, though I will ask again and see if they are just confirming my bias or being objective if that is possible. Meanwhile, Twitter/X AI model, Grok, did sayI should give it a go still, hence I am on the fence still about Wonka, but we will see... ideally I would love to talk about this to a friend, but because I would also point to my political anxieties, as I hate the left and DEI, that would also put me in a complicated position. The friend more on the left would find harder to understand, and this could cause us to antagonize one another, while some friends more on the right could share of my deep resentment and amplity it, also why I recur to AI as well. It is what it is.

So, this is my, so to speak, chaotic map for February, maybe I will attend the cinema, though I am skeptical of the movie, basically I am willing to see Marty Supreme because I find Timothee quite handsome. It is rare these days that I feel even inclined to watch a movie, I still remember how disappointed (though not surprised) I was with the Phoenician Scheme. Maybe I am not the only one, that film seen to have come and went without leaving any trace, it seems the bias I have is correct: it could never die because it was not alive in the first place.

With that, I think I will take my leave for today's post, and of course you should not worry, I will be back for more posts with my life, ideas and thoughts, for us to talk about! As always, thank you for being here, my great dear friend! I see you on next time, around this new week of February! Maybe I will have watched Marty Supreme by then, and I pray I may like it, we'll see... wish you the best, farewell just for now!