Good morning, my friend, reader of this post! How are you? Hope your weekend went okay? As for me, I am okay... Sunday was a bit rough, I just felt tired for the vast majority of that day. I do hope the new week may be one of deliverance and relief for us all. Again, another lovely day of winter, and specially now before dusk, when the temperature is in its lowest. Very pleasant!! One that lives in the tropics cannot take it for granted. I certainly do not.
For some reason, on Saturday, I was plagued with a bad case of nostalgism. Perhaps just thinking of my most overall pleasant year of 2012, now getting more distant in the past. Mostly through music, I was thinking once again of the one that got away, Katy Perry. Decided to bring her memory back into my music library, for the sake of that time when pop culture peaked, perhaps for the last time. That prompt me to go through some old music folders, I saw some old purchases, such as the album by George Ezra, whom was someone, a musician, that I used to like a lot. Not all of course tied to 2012. Katy's most influential year with me was the terrible yeat of 2014. George with me peaked just before my major depression crisis of 2018, while 2017 the year was of his music. At moments it all blur, the thoughts of past years, which is a shame, I was very much alive through it. At times, I get events and music listened towards in the wrong order. In any case, fun that I started the blog with George in mind. He was never the main theme, though, as when I created this publication, he was already fading.
Cultural landscape for me definitely shifted. I was in a rebellious phase on my high school years, all because of the disgusting curriculum I had to endure during those sad years. In philosophy, all we saw was essentially critical theory, which they tried to endorse with such strenght one could call, beyond indocrination, struggle session. We were taught at the same time everything is culture and nothing is, and there is not a better or worse culture, except the western one must be dismantled. Such evil crap, evil and pathetic, but since I was not offered an alternative worldview at that time, I was in an intellectual and spiritual weak point. My philosophy teacher, how I detested that man. He loathed America, and wanted us to renounce pop culture and embrace his terrible ways instead, the way of the leftist intellectual. I hate to remember those years, and how bad they were. Because I was always enthusiastic of free market capitalism, they were particularly harsh on me. I had nightmares with the evil Marx man, and I could not endure looking at a slum, because I was told all the time it was my fault. I was the one to blame for the woes of the country. And as such, I was to live in shame, to repent, and to become a good comrade. Of course, even then I was determined to reject them, to denounce and spit on their teachings, but I had no counterpoint. And so, I was exhausted, for many years I was defeated, and only found out I was correct after all, or at least my views were very much valid, shortly after high school ended.
There is a lot I would love to say on this matter, but it becomes a blur, I don't know where it begins or ends. And I just don't want this to get too long, it would be tiresome for you. And painful for me to remember. For now, this snippet should be enough. Eventually I gained first readinf and knowledge on my own ideas and mind frame, then I went beyond pragmatism and into philosophy, on my terms and on authors I was denied before. Finally, I gained confidence and boldness in my views. And here I am today, in such a better position, and mind you, still have moments of sadness, desperation... but it is not because of my studies, but in spite of them. I am in such a better position personally, even if there were losses, setbacks, societal collapse around me. It started with conviction, though, and also with the sensation something was off in the consensus around me. And as such, my desire to be a contrarian, to oppose and oppose entirely everything I was raised to like.
Really, there is a lot to be said, but please, I don't want this to get too long, not want to waste your time, or to suffer through bad memories. I am just happpy to have written today! And may I draw as well at some point!! Maybe even today, should I have any cool idea in mind! We'll see. Thank you for being a friend, and for being here, I am so happy to see you, and I wish you the best. Of course, I will be back for more thoughts and ideas and lore real soon, hopefully around the mid of the week. Until then, I wish you the best, and I bid you farewell, just for now though!!
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