In Which It is the Height of the Season, at last!

Hello, sir! Hello, madame! Good morning, my friend, reader of the present post! Happy December, and it is a happy moment, as I can now say in full force the beautiful Merry Christmas sentence! How are you, today? How is the weather? I am okay, yesterday was pretty bad, though. Ah... just tech issues, you know? I felt I lost most of my day wrestling against Sims 3, and I lost this round. I uninstalled and reinstalled the game multiple times and the results were worse and worse, until I lost all my patience. The future for this game in my life is uncertain, though I never fully discard something with a declaration. It has been a particularly rough season for this now zombie franchise. The old friendly ghost of the seas disappeared, and with him, the whole of supply of Sims 4, the door for this one game now for me is positively shut, not that I wanted it open anyway, that game is mediocre and aggravating. Sims 3 is so much better, and yet, I am taking, unoficially, a break from it. A break that I hope I can contain myself as to last for more than several hours. I do NOT desire to succumb to my impulses and try to reinstall the game and make it work, no. I can have better uses for one day, than toiling on a machine where my goal was fulfillment and catharsis of the moment. No. A break for now it is. God knows I can be impulsive and not disciplined, but I did greatly diminished the influence of Europa Universalis 4 in my life before. As such, I can even fly!

Europa Universalis 4, such a game that is a machine for deep frustration, as such, I unoficially walked away from it. And I look onto EU5 with much caution, as not to throw myself on the chasing of achievements again. One can have a much more gaming routine, if any. No, my time on those games is mostly not wasted, but given there are too many games and not enough available time, one must make choices. It is true, Sims 3 will likely leave for now a great void, but maybe another game is at hand to claim this niche left vacant. It is Christmas, the only place to go is up, I can fly. And I have a Santa Claus to visit.

Speaking of hobbies, perhaps I will finally find the desire to draw something! I have been facing a creative block, and what a tragic one, happening precisely on the season of Christmas, when I crave to celebrate with my doodles, as much as one can. I hope this moment of low productivity can be overcome with time, at the end of the day I just want a christmas season of some relief and deliverance.

One other plan I have is to try and finish the audiobook I have been listening on the life of Emperor Meiji, that giant of Japan. Since the book is painfully detailed, with all events happening being most carefully woven together and explained, the work has around 49 hours! It is not as big as the Treatise on Economics by Ludwig Von Mises, Human Action, but Mises has such an immense talent for explaining his ideas, that 62 hours on his immense work go faster than 10 in some other less happy written work. Ah, God knows I feel a bit dizzy today, I could not sleep so well because accidentally I had a biger dosis of dipirone than I should. The doctor tranquilizes me saying the quantity I had was not enough to cause harm, but the panic was set, and I feared if I closed my eyes, I may nevee open them again, I do want to live, when I say I can fly, I did not mean in a macabre way!

I think, no matter what one says against Anno 117, it is quite a gorgeous game concerning graphics, don't you agree?

It has been a rough couple of dozen hours, I can only pray for some inspiration, also, for any drawing, or any desire to engage in a computer game that is both stimulating and also not draining. One step at a time, for all I can see, maybe I will just recover my sleep time and nap a bit more. Since the vacation time is here, I am more carefree on my routine. Often, such availability works against my mental health, as I feel vagrant, I feel like the world will condemn me for not working and making money. I have tried not to entertain neither to stimulate any criticism on that direction, given how hard it has been to find work compatible with my abilities, if any. And I know, History is not the most useful curriculum, but to hell with use. Once I went to admin school just because it was useful and I hated it so much it threw me in yet another wave of depression and even weight gain. I could care less at this point about use, I just want a diploma, and finish this chapter of my life, and to hopefully Never to have to study math against my explicit will. I of course dread the idea of having to toil on archives to look for obscure documents, I hope I can avoid that too. I know, petty, silly of me to say such words. Again, I don't care, because it is my life. I would be depressed if dear Johannes would abandon our friendship due to any attitude I have without trying, but I would be depressed and still on my merry way. It is what it is, I can fly. 

I think we ought to wrap up this post, don't you think? I say it because it is getting too big, more writing and it would get too hard to follow, for you, and for me, because of how I write the journal entries. I hope to return to this publication real soon, hopefully before next week, so I can hopefully write about good things, though routine not always has thar in store for me. Anyway, once again, Merry Christmas season 2025, another one for the registry, and hopefully with good memories. See you again real soon, farewell for now.