From a fellow Conservatarian, to dear Mr. Kirk (1993-2025)

Really, who am I? And how dare such nobody write anything? Yet I do. Yet I am quite apalled over the recent murder of Mr. Kirk, Charles Kirk. It is a name that has been present in my intellectual life for as long as I have been studying conservatism, classical liberalism, libertarianism, the set of ideas that I always had strong leanings towards, and that I effectively embraced fully in Late 2016. In the pettiness of routine, and I must add, it is a good pettiness, I was not actively following this good man, but that was on a different spectrum of conservatarianism than me. Yet, when I received the email with the headline that he was attacked, in such vicious manner, that was enough to make me to the point of throwing up. He was one of my own, a conservatarian, a contrarian, someone with intellectual curiosity and a desire to spread good ideas. Definitely far more patient than me, as he went to talk with people far opposed to his own leanings, while I prefer not to debate, I find it useless. He did not, he thrived at it, I am reminded of Socrates, the one that asked the why to his audience. Socrates was sentenced to death. Charles did not even have this "mercy", the person that caused such suffering acted with not a single trace of legitimacy, because when it comes to assassination, there can NEVER be any. Socrates lived on the verge of the Classical Era, so many centuries ago. We live in a time that, for a while, some judged to be a moment of thriving civilization, yet Socrates had more dignity in his horrific end than Charles. I refuse to say that this is a problem of "society", of "America", of the world. DO NOT DARE to cast the fault of one bad man with evil ideas upon us all, we do not deserve any of it. Yes, it was a man, and he was possessed by the devil of leftism. I do not feel entirely comfortable writing where he lean, because I don't want, ever, anyone to die. I thrive at seeing people happy if their happiness is legitimate, I like going to Instagram and seeing the smiles, even I smile there too. I abhor tragedy, and.. what an awful one. Even if it happened close to the anniversary of the most gruesome terrorist attack, that of the destruction of the World Trade Center, and that of the explosion of the Twin Buddhas in Afghanistan at the same moment, I will not say that it is fault of September, September does not deserve this. Grandpa's birthday is today, it is a bit... odd, how something happy can cohexist with gruesome other sides to life on reality. I did mention reality is better than the dreams or nightmares one has. It still is so, because violence of such kind never fits well into daily routine. At all, actually. This is not reality, this is a moment when a nightmare drips a bit of its terrific substance into our lives. I am reminded of Kaiserin Elisabeth of Austria, the Sissi, beloved of Austrian and Hungarians. She was also victim of one of the most gruesome acts of terror in 19th century Europe. Another moment of instability on the continent back in late 19th century, propelled by the same baalistic ideas that cause so much pain today. Socialism, collectivism. The idea that "people change" is not an accurate one, neither should be the case, but... how unsettling, how uncanny, that evil exists, and it does. How easily it spreads, and how happily it reaps everything around, in raging joy. A joy no one wants to be in the way of. Who am I? I am a fellow conservatarian, a fellow human, someone normal, someone of the middle class, gladly so, and maybe even a christian. There are many diagrams that put Kirk on what I'd call "one of my own", and even if that was not the case, this is a catastrophic moment, and to the world, not to just America, even if the land of the free is on the epicenter. That's the thing about terminal hurricanes, they have an epicenter, but all the surroundings are demolished as well. So... never forget of the event of September 11th 2001. Do not neglect the destruction of socialism, and I am sure God is giving Mr. Kirk a kind reception to heaven. We here suffer. I know it could not be different... still hurts.