Good evening, my friend, dear reader of this post! Happy Monday! It is indeed the beginning of a new week of October! So, I should ask: How are you? How was your previous week? I hope your first days of October have been productive and fulfilling, as much as they can be! I am not exactly having the most creative ones. I would love to work on a drawing, but at times I just feel a fog in my head, when thinking of anything that requires a bit more of creative effort or so. Quite a shame. I am aware one is preferred to go one day at a time, sometimes this is too much even, time feels like is smashing me. With that in mind, I do have a mean voice in my head that warns me: I will in the future look at this time with woe and feel so much disgrace and pain, because I did not draw. Well, anyway, smashing as it is, time moves forward.
How is the weather for you? Here we are on Spring, but the past few days have been, much to my relief, quite fresh and not at all overwhelmingly hot. I do not take it for granted, given I know a single warm up may sinalize the beginning of true summer. The only good thing that comes with such thing is indeed Christmas, that glorious moment, culmination of all my dreams and hopes. The satisfying conclusion to the end of another year, one that has been 30 years in one concerning happenings. God bless the child that will bring forth the most beautiful moment. It is His son, after all.
I started writing this entry some days ago, but as I mentioned, I haven't been on a terribly creative moment, and I suppose most beginning of months move on that direction, alas. I am again pointing towards more productive times, though, and I must update my Patreon. I did not mention as I did not have the chance, but as far as I am concerned, dear Ruben still is offering me his kind sponsorship! That is a relief! I hope at least we can talk in case he decided not to give his support anymore, not to shame, but to thank him and to ask what could have gone differently, if any, and what went alright. In any case, I should work on a drawing at some point real soon! Will try not to overthink it, because doing so, I will lose the joy of doing the activity.
If anything I am already all dressed up for Christmas! This ChatGPT image I made some days ago is so nice! I wish it was more resemblant of me, but it is what it is.
I have just started my college classes for October, so that is one productive thing to do, apart from writing! At times, it feels very dreary to open the blog drafting page, and not having much of an idea on what to write. I am on a lesser creative moment, just crawling out of it as it is. I feel terrible for not updating the blog the past week, it is like I will abandon this and other activities for good, due to my mental exhaustion. I pray and hope that is not the case. It is true that at times my whole being revolts against the idea of doing something nice with the day, in favor instead of staying still and laying in comfortable surfaces for many many hours. It is not the case, but how loud the voice of fatigue is. On the same note, different direction, I use the computer at times for more than an hour, and it is like I lost a whole decade of my life, and I lost any online friendship I could have had. Also deeply corrosive on my mind is this idea. Truth be told, I just wish I could have the chance to talk to my best friend, and I wish he could open a bit more time in his life to talk to me. I am forced, as much as I try not to go this direction, to put him as my first priority, while I am not even in any life in his life's whole set of books. Demoralizing. It is not his fault, I will not punish myself to think I am pathetic and to blame, as to go towards stoicism and to just put all faults into me, for me to fiz. No. This I will not do. I am skeptical of the stoic thinking, as to be critical of this approach. While I detest the postmodern tendencies, I will not go too far towards the other direction. If I am nothing special, truth is I am not pathetic either. I just am me, Daniel. I also don't think all of things in life are us to fix, or to struggle with. I am no deterministic, either, I entirely subscribe to anything related to free will. But my approach is a balanced one, if I don't expect to have the whole of my life in my hands, I also don't think I am a box for people to throw their dirty laundries in.
I am so happy that I could finally finish this blog piece! I want to hopefully do some more, and I will mention my desire too. I have been told "don't wish, just do it", but if I stop mentioning, odds are I will lose a topic of conversation, and also will not dtaw, either, the worst of both worlds. At times, the pencil feels heavier than what I can hold. Gravity pulls me to the ground, and my eyes are strained. Maybe I need somw more rest, we shall see. Whatever the case, I wish you, my friend, an splendid Friday, and of course, the best! See you again real Soon, hopefully sooner than next week, and I can draw as well.
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