Good morning, dear friend, reader of this post! Happy Wednesday! How are you, today? How is the week going, so far? How is the weather? As for me, I am okay... though yesterday was not that good of a day, in retrospect. I was very uninspired and frustrated for not finding motivation to do anything. Not drawing, not playing games, not writing... I did a bit of reading, but it was not enough to cast aside the sadness of such situation. I had pilates, which made things worse. Unfortunately on my sessions I am surrounded by mediocre leftists, it pains me to include my grandma from mother's side in this group, but in fact, she is very much a part of it. It is always an absurd what I hear, from their tolerance towards bad practices from fringe culture groups, and paying their dues towards terrible artists, and of course, I cannot forget the shame I feel for having in the family someone that likes, nay, loves the butcher of Argentina. How awful, what a hopeless feel I have, to have these people next to my life. And how bad that mom and even my brother fall under her influence, the latter being borderline a traitor, because he was so close to getting out of the trap some years ago, and yet he fell for it... I hate to be so reliant on such people and for they to control what I can say where I happen to sleep. Notice I don't say my home, I have no home, no place to feel comfortable. Comfort is no replacement for safety. I have moments where I have the ilusion I am at the mercy of my ideological rivals. Those words are harsh, but unfortunately it is how it goes. Here on the blog is the only place I have to express my agony, so I hope you understand...
Some lovely Christmas wrapping, here used to fight the evil ideas of the left.
I miss my grandma of the father's side, much more on my side of things, but as she moved, I did not have the opportunity to visit her yet. Hopefully by my birthday... one can only hope... Well, apart from the moments of much disconfort that I mentioned with details some lines ago, I can only be grateful I survived it. What can we do, but keep on going? It's not like I have much choice. Today, it is going not as bad. I feel some joy again, I hope I can play some nice games, I certainly have some in mind to do so. I may, though won't force myself, even draw! Those are the last days of my seasonal vacation, soon classes will resume, I am reasonably looking forward to it. It really depends on the discipline to be ministered though. We'll see, once again, as we always do.
I keep being bothered by a huge influx of unknown phone calls, is it my bank, because I haven't paid my debt yet? I must say, what a bothersome thing, to call me nonstop until I "give in" or something. Dear institution, I am well aware I have bills to pay, and willing I am to pay them. But I have no money available, not yet. It should come soon, but it is not with me, now. If this is unaceptable, there is nothing I can do now anyway. If you could stop harassing me with the phone calls, I'd be grateful. Whoever is bombarding me with 10-20 phone calls a day, really knows how to get to my nerves... anyway, whatever one can do...
I have written quite a bit today, and much on my woes. I appreciate you still being here, on my moments of despair. Anyway, such is life. I think this is a good point to wrap things up on this journal. When should I be back? I do expect somewhere around next week. I will have at least one post left for July, which is the one wrapping the month up, but I may return sooner, we'll see. In any case, I wish you the best, and I see you again real soon! May your coffee never runs cold.
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